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[11 Dec 2004|05:09pm]
[ mood | sexy ]

i heard a good joke yesterday about a bear and taylor and the passionate love they made all night long.
i'm so fucking jealous.
bitch, if i ever get my body back i am SO taking you on in the arena

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[24 Nov 2004|03:50pm]
robin and i spent a night together just the way i like it: durrty. the puffs were so thick we had trouble finding eachother in my living room.

we managed, eventually. IF you know what i mean.
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so: cyrus jones lived forever... why can't I?!?!?!?!?! [24 Nov 2004|03:45pm]
Grave digger:
When you dig my grave,
could you make it shallow
so that I can feel the rain?
grave digger?

Ring around the rosy
Pocket full of posies
Ashes to ashes
{musical intro}
We all fall down!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Fuck me gently with a chainsaw! [18 Jul 2004|10:57pm]
[ mood | dirty ]

abby_is_evil's Word Usage
1. i (45) 26. know (7) 51. fuck (3) 76. between (2)
2. and (22) 27. it (7) 52. sex (3) 77. much (2)
3. you (22) 28. are (6) 53. turns (3) 78. corner (2)
4. to (20) 29. in (6) 54. from (3) 79. hell (2)
5. the (19) 30. have (6) 55. caitlin (3) 80. damn (2)
6. love (18) 31. on (6) 56. dearest (3) 81. lux (2)
7. of (16) 32. night (5) 57. when (3) 82. up (2)
8. abby (15) 33. skill (5) 58. why (3) 83. i'll (2)
9. mary (15) 34. this (5) 59. for (3) 84. reinhart (2)
10. taylor (13) 35. last (5) 60. will (3) 85. bunk (2)
11. my (13) 36. don't (5) 61. now (3) 86. bed (2)
12. so (12) 37. but (5) 62. want (3) 87. all (2)
13. is (10) 38. like (5) 63. did (3) 88. mean (2)
14. a (10) 39. level (4) 64. diary (3) 89. lonely (2)
15. that (10) 40. time (4) 65. sleep (2) 90. too (2)
16. me (9) 41. what (4) 66. death (2) 91. 1 (2)
17. with (9) 42. good (4) 67. take (2) 92. journal (2)
18. mrs (8) 43. your (4) 68. must (2) 93. fat (2)
19. if (8) 44. or (4) 69. talk (2) 94. add (2)
20. they (7) 45. by (4) 70. taylor's (2) 95. two (2)
21. not (7) 46. i'm (3) 71. cocktail (2) 96. kill (2)
22. out (7) 47. alone (3) 72. does (2) 97. as (2)
23. was (7) 48. method (3) 73. fucking (2) 98. at (2)
24. her (7) 49. extra (3) 74. it's (2) 99. be (2)
25. feel (7) 50. just (3) 75. lately (2) 100. herbal (2)
Word Count by Hutta.
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I'm glad I'm not you. [08 Jul 2004|04:22am]
[ mood | gloomy ]

How to make a Dolly of Mass Destruction

3 parts success

1 part silliness

1 part empathy
Add to a cocktail shaker and mix vigorously. Add a little lustfulness if desired!


Personality cocktail
From Go-Quiz.com

What Is Your Best Sexual Skill?
Flirting Skill Level - 92%
Kissing Skill Level - 4%
Cudding Skill Level - 88%
Sex Skill Level - 98%
Why They Love You You are too good to be true.
Why They Hate You You talk too much.
This Quiz by lady_wintermoon - Taken 212232 Times.
New - Help with love and dating!

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Jailbait... [13 Jun 2004|06:15pm]
[ mood | incarcerated ]

Dearest Fucktards,

I was arrested last night for indecent exposure.


3 comments|post comment

Another day without a lover, the more I come to understand... the touch of my hand. [23 May 2004|11:51pm]
[ mood | uncomfortable ]

Dear Diary,

My chlamydia has been acting up lately. Damn you, Mrs. Crump. (Sorry to Mrs. McCabe-Hense, Mrs. Reinhart, Mrs. Loftus, Mrs. Gonzalez, Mrs. Caro, Mrs. Junemann, Mrs. Lux, and the bevvy of other mothers I've infected along the way). Tee hee.

Does anyone know of any herbal... or not so herbal... ;) remedies for assuaging my veneral-woes?


Look at this horseshit:

abby_is_evil is poisonous! Induce vomitting if ingested.


From Go-Quiz.com
1 comment|post comment

Oh, I do more than flirt with death... ;) [21 May 2004|05:17pm]
[ mood | hyper'nhorny. hyporny? horper? ]

Take the quiz: "Method of Suicide"

You seek out danger and flirt with death. Your method of suicide is a Death Wish.

I fuck his brains out.

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Back in Black... [19 May 2004|12:44pm]
[ mood | grateful ]

Your mom was so good last night.


PS: I love living at Taylor's... I hardly miss Mary, except when I'm lonely and desperately seeking some sweet and tender loving. I digress, Taylor is vastly superior to Mary.

PPS: I am not being brainwashed.

PPPS: I swear.

6 comments|post comment

One giant leap for Mankind. [11 May 2004|08:46pm]
[ mood | artistic ]

Join my community... you know you want to. ;)


1 comment|post comment

Eternal torment of a confused soul... [09 May 2004|06:15pm]
[ mood | scared ]

Dearest Diary,

I don't know what to do. I'm so scared, so alone. You feel quite empty when you feel all alone. I would turn to Taylor and Mary if I could, but I can't. They are going through a rough time together. They are always fighting about who gets custody of me over the summer. I feel like everything is my fault. Do you ever feel like this, Diary? I know you can't talk, but I know you "feel". Anyways, nothing is worse than being torn between two worlds. I love both of them, and I don't want to lose either of them... but I know I'll have to choose.

I just feel so lost.

...and lonely.

...and horny as Hell.


5 comments|post comment

O, confound the rest! Such love must needs be treason in my breast! [06 May 2004|03:14pm]
[ mood | bitchy ]

My guts are falling out.

...and why the fuck is Kate Lux sleeping with Mary and Taylor?

Love and a big fat fuck you,

4 comments|post comment

Eternal damnation... [02 May 2004|01:56pm]
[ mood | aggravated ]

Dearest fucking Livejournal,

So, The Hussies have figured me out... they have finally met my doppelganger... or shall I say, the female embodiment of my flesh. So, if you fuckers think that this is the end of the Huggable, Lovable Rag Doll... you are sorely mistaken.

Soon I will unleash my fury and wreak havoc on your dying, desolate souls.

Sorry I haven't updated lately... I have been to busy with j.woods to keep my mind straight... or my stuffing inside of me.


7 comments|post comment

I <3 Humping! [19 Apr 2004|05:45pm]
[ mood | bad breath ]


Will you hump me, Mary Caro?


2 comments|post comment

HEHEHE!!! [18 Apr 2004|07:13pm]
[ mood | enraged ]

Taylor didn't come home last night... So, I took revenge on her by having sex with Mary in Taylor's bed last night. Mary is so much better in the sack than Taylor anyway!

By the way, you people obviously did not take my threat seriously. If someone does not post in my GODDAMN journal... there will be HELL to pay!!!


2 comments|post comment

WHAT THE FUCK? MOTHAFUCKAS? [17 Apr 2004|07:42pm]
[ mood | angry ]

What the SHIT? I feel so unappreciated. You stupid friends of Mary and Taylor better comment in this damn journal, BITCHES! or I'll FUCKING GUT YOU!!! EACH AND EVERY LAST ONE OF YOU!!! I mean, imagine how hard it is to type with no fingers!!! ...just one lousy opposable thumb I use to get pimps to pick me up off my corner for a good time!


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[17 Apr 2004|03:03pm]
[ mood | enraged ]

It turns out that Taylor did not sleep alone on the bottom bunk. It turns out that Mary and I did not get it on. It turns out that Abby was squished between Diana and Taylor all night long, while Mary slumbered sweetly above me.

Diana must die.


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Spiderman is eating me for dinner!!! WEEE!!! [17 Apr 2004|12:45am]
[ mood | crazy ]

Mary came home extra early from Cooper's house so that we can start getting it on extra soon. Taylor can sleep by herself on the bottom bunk tonight... that's sad.


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Guess who's back? Back again? Abby's back. Tell a friend. [16 Apr 2004|01:00pm]
[ mood | lonely ]

Today was a good day, I guess. Taylor slept through her first two classes, so I was able to spend some extra time with her. I tried to cuddle, but her fat ass kept smushing me. Dejected, I spent the remainder of the day in the corner of her bed crying.

I hope Mary takes a nap after Lit. Trad. ;)

If you know what I mean.


2 comments|post comment

Thoughts on the recent room lottery... [15 Apr 2004|09:43pm]
[ mood | wrathful ]

I was recently informed that Taylor and Mary are rooming with Caitlin Reinhart next year. I must admit, I felt pangs of jealousy when I heard the news... it was almost as if they had betrayed me. Now, it's not that I don't like Caitlin, it's that I don't like sharing Mary and Taylor. I guess I'm just a little paranoid that they'll stop spending time with me, now that they have her.

Now, I don't want to kill Caitlin like I had to kill Catalina and Lauren... but if she proves problematic, I won't hesitate in slitting her throat.


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